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May 5, 2009

Johnson’s Wax Decorating Ideas for Hookers

outdoor-typeWhat in God’s name is going on with this picture? 

I mean….Welcome again to How To Have A Prettier Room, a cute little pamphlet put out by the Johnson’s Wax company with decorating ideas for teenage girls.  So far we have seen how to decorate a room for the Artistic Type and the Romantic Type. Now we are on to the girl dubbed, the “Outdoor Type”, and it is time to face some facts.

No girl would ever associate herself with this picture. Ever.

From the premature wrinkles to the snarled, dirty hair, the illustrator for this little booklet does a disservice to young girls everywhere who love the outdoors. No one would ever admit to being this type of girl.  Ever! Why did they have to make her so ugly compared to the other girls?  What is the point of that? What girl is going to point at this picture and say, “Yep. That’s me. The ugly one.” And why does she look so old? With her uncombed hair, caterpillar eyebrows and too much lipstick she looks more like a tired hooker than a girl who likes to go camping.

But I digress.  outdoor-type001

If you love burning leaves and ugly movie stars, this here is the room for you.

God, this is embarrassing. Let’s just get this over with.


I have to admit, though, I love that lamp on the bookcase. They can keep the moldy fishing basket.


The storage locker is cute, and I love the space filler row of pictures.  The little wastebasket painted with atomic bursts is really a good idea.

So, that is it for the poor Outdoor Type.  Join us next week when we show you the type of girl everyone loves to hate…the Prom Personality.

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6 Responses to Johnson’s Wax Decorating Ideas for Hookers

  1. Sara in AZ Reply

    May 5, 2009 at 11:27 am

    Tired Hooker……Hilarious! 🙂

  2. Tikimama Reply

    May 5, 2009 at 3:23 pm

    You’re so funny! If I was as “ugly” as that girl, I’d be happy! And since when is Rock Hudson ugly??? You confused me with that one.

    I love their advice in this pamplet – use burlap, denim, fake plants, pipe cleaners, golf tees, fishing baskets. Sounds like more of a butch girl room than anything else. Is that what “outdoorsy” was code for back in the 50s?!

    My parents had ciderblock and board bookshelves FOREVER! I kinda like them now…must be nostalgia!

  3. Karen Reply

    May 5, 2009 at 10:51 pm

    She looks like Donna Reed!

    “you’d rather have a date with Rock Hudson than with Cary Grant”


  4. harmonsmith Reply

    May 6, 2009 at 5:34 am

    Decorating your home can be an exciting experience. Whether you have just moved into a new place or you are merely looking for a new style, it can be a lot of fun. My house was decorate Nina . A professional in this regard and in my low budget she did her job very well

  5. Carolyn @ The Mobile-Homemaker Reply

    February 23, 2012 at 11:24 am

    You are cracking me up.

    I just featured this pamphlet on my latest post, and after doing a search for the year of publication, stumbled across your blog posts. Holy moly, I’m dying over here.

    (And pssst, my 5 month old’s name is Ruth too. The Ruths need to stick together in this world of Hunters and Bellas).

    • RetroRuth Reply

      February 24, 2012 at 4:47 pm

      Glad you like it, Carolyn! Your blog is rock-tastic as well. And so funny!

      Yes, us Ruths have to unite!! It is an awesome name. 🙂

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