February 14, 2011A Pulp Fiction Valentine’s Day
Okay, we are up to our eyeballs in love-stuff today. Which is great for everyone who wants to snuggle up and give their cuddle-bug eskimo kisses, but a person can only take so much. I decided to cut through the sticky treacle in the blogosphere with some great 1950’s torrid paperback storylines featuring hoods, murder and a frigid woman!
And some awesome illustrations!
“He was hounded by hoods and a corrupt woman.”
“And in his violent search through the flea-bitten jungle of hoods and vice dolls he met the beautiful nymphomaniac who…”
Okay, wait, wait, wait. That’s just far enough, buddy. Whew.
“Starkly real?” Really? How real can a book be that talks about “yielding to naked savagery?” Who relates to that?
“So Sid, how did you like that book I lent ya’?”
“Wooo, Bill! That one was a BLAST. The best part was how REAL it was. I mean, the flea-bitten hoods, the flea-bitten vice dolls, the flea-bitten nymphomaniacs. It was like I was reading about my own LIFE.”
“I know what you mean, Sid. The brutal killings, the naked savagery. It’s like the author knows me.”
“So true, so true. Here let me give this back to you…oops, little Sid wrote all over the cover the morning during breakfast. Do you have an eraser I can borrow to take care of this?”
“Sure, just let me check my…nope. Not with me. Let’s go ask the secretary.”
Yeah. Just like the book!
The murderer shot twice, which is waaaay more than once.
All kidding aside, this book is actually still in print today. E.X. Ferrars, or Elizabeth Ferrars, was a highly popular and prolific British crime writer, and her style of writing has been compared to Agatha Christie.
Plus, it has “Gertrude” the Kangaroo. Who can argue with Gertrude?
“The story of a healthy man…and a frigid woman.”
“Every man must read this frank solution to a common problem.”
Okay, so why does just every man have to read it? What about the women? Maybe she won’t touch you because you are reading books like these. How’s that for a frank solution, buddy?
And how’s that for a Valentine’s Day post????